


lift me back up to the sun

by crookedspoon



Series: I never liked that ending either [4]
Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, Joseph Kavinsky Lives, M/M, POV Joseph Kavinsky, Rehabilitation, wordcount: 500
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-14
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-03-31 11:54:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13974588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crookedspoon/pseuds/crookedspoon
Summary: "How's progress?""The literal worst. Today my shrink told me to choose whether I want to live."





	lift me back up to the sun

**Author's Note:**

  * For [galateaofthewestside](https://archiveofourown.org/users/galateaofthewestside/gifts).



> For "Power" from the inktober for writers list and #479 "Frightened" at slashthedrabble.

The night's cloudless and less soggy than daytime when Skov meets him on the roof of his new apartment. Kavinsky's searched for new digs the moment he was released from the hospital, not even waiting for his eighteenth birthday to get away from that banshee of a mother. 

The last forgery he ever made was her signature on his new lease.

"How's progress?" Skov asks after eternities of looking up at the stars. He's smoking his cigarette to the filter, that's how nervous he is. Kavinsky can relate. He's not as easy to be around as he used to be.

"The literal worst." Case in point: his newfound honesty. Not that he's ever been much of a liar, but he kept certain things to himself. Not so much anymore. Let the others suffer with him. "Today my shrink told me to choose whether I want to live."

"Woo, shit. No need to get so real on me."

"You asked, fucker."

"Okay, sure. Put it all on me. I'm used to being the ass of the nation," Skov says dramatically as he stubs out his filter. "But seriously, you done some contemplating on that yet?"

"What the fuck do you think, asshole? That I suddenly had an epiphany after years of putting it off?" He thought he'd answered that question already, but maybe killing himself over another boy wasn't the answer after all.

"Who knows, man? Stranger things have happened. You finally getting some sense into that thick head of yours wouldn't be the weirdest."

Kavinsky shoots him a dubious look. "Where's Skov and what have you done with him?"

Skov shrugs uncomfortably. "You gave us all a scare when you ended up in the hospital. Can't fault a guy for being worried about a friend."

"You mean when I stopped selling," Kavinsky snorted. _Friend._ Yeah, right. Like they've ever had heart-to-hearts like this before. "You never once showed up when I went in after an OD."

"Uh, obviously? You checked out so fast, the first time we heard about your brief hospital stints was when you fucking told us, like, the following night at your next party."

"And you laughed about it." 

"You played it for laughs, dickhead, so don't complain if it worked. But yeah, I guess we were too strung-out to care. And we did have mad respect for your party-hard mentality. You were batshit crazy but that's what made you so cool."

"Was? You make it sound like I'm dead or some shit."

Skov hesitates. "Aren't you, in a way? The old you, I mean."

"Wish he were, man. But he's still here, demanding I get high every damn day. Sometimes I think people want you to be sober just so you're as miserable as they are. That's how they control you."

"You're right. Old you's not dead. You're still as paranoid as ever." Skov knocks his shoulder against Kavinsky's. And takes his hand. "I'm here, you know. For when you do decide to answer that question."

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Gravity" by A Perfect Circle, which has been part of the soundtrack for the Rehab AU since forever.
> 
> Rebloggable post [here](https://crookedspoonfic.tumblr.com/post/171939798180/fic-479-frightened-trc-kskov-t-500w).


End file.
